Both my husband and I have noses like hound dogs. We are both obsessed with how our house smells. Our favorite scents are fresh laundry, ocean
breeze, linen, or lemon. You wouldn’t
believe the amount of chemicals we use around the house to make sure it smells “fresh.”
Now that little Tilmon Edward has made his debut we’re
limited in what chemicals we can use and trust me, a lemon Yankee Candle is no
match for a chocolate lab and a trash can full of dirty diapers. I’m like a tasmanian devil when I enter the
nursery and catch the whiff of a bad smell: clothes to the laundry room, empty
the diaper pail, wipe off the changing table, vacuum the floor, and dust. This is my slightly OCD routine every morning
(well for the last month anyway).
Last Friday I lost my mind.
The maid hasn’t been here in a month (yes we have a maid – go on and
judge us, but it’s not as expensive as you think and I’m just over scrubbing
toilets) and I couldn’t track down the smell.
It’s amazing what you can do during your baby’s two hour nap. I went room to room sanitizing everything in
my sight. All of the usual suspects had
been dealt with:
·
Nursery – all clothes/linens/burp cloths were in
the laundry room, trash can empty of all diapers and disinfected, all toys
wiped down. Note to self: NEVER smell a
burp cloth to see if it is clean. Always
assume it’s dirty, it’s just not worth risking sticking your sensitive nose
anywhere near in the event it’s been used.
·
Living Room – dog bed washed, floors swept, all
surfaces dusted, clear of burp cloths and pacifiers, chairs vacuumed, blankets
washed
·
Our room – sheets changed, all laundry put up
and washed, bathroom cleaned (wiped down at least – again, I’m on scrubbing strike),
everything dusted, rug vacuumed
·
Guest Bedroom – Hasn’t been used since February
but I still vacuumed and dusted just in case the smell could be found there
·
Spare Bathroom – baby bathtub/bucket wiped down,
all washcloths in the laundry room, all surfaces wiped down
·
Kitchen – took the trash out, wiped down
counters (ewe – our countertops can hide lots of spills), bleached the sink,
ran the disposal just in case, cleaned out the refrigerator. All dishes washed and put away. Swept the floor.
I go outside for some fresh air to reset and pat myself on
my back. I walk back in and do a sniff
test. It is most assuredly better but
there is still the faint smell of stale pee and sour milk. I give up and since Teddy is still sleeping I
decide to hop in the shower. I go to
pull the shirt over my head and damn near throw up. The bad smell is my shirt. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I’m exhausted and generally disappointed in
myself. I could really use a nap or 30 minutes
to just zone out and watch a Bones episode, but of course the second my hiney
hits the couch…..waaa waaa waaa. Time to feed the baby.
this is hysterical! rookie mistake...ALWAYS ALWAYS assume it is YOU that smells. its your shoulder. your shirt. your hand. sick but true!
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